Dear Jack // Tomorrow you start big school

Dear Jack,

I know it’s terribly clichéd, but time really does fly when you’re having fun. I can’t believe the time has come for you to head off to ‘big school’ for the first time tomorrow and I’m excited for you and totally over-emotional in equal measure!

It only feels like yesterday that you were wrapped up in my arms for the first time and your little black eyes were blinking back at me. I knew from that very moment what unconditional love meant. A love so fierce and powerful. A mother’s love.

Over the past 4 years (nearly 5!), I can honestly say you’ve been an absolute joy. We somehow totally avoided the terrible twos (and threes) and you really have been a ray of sunshine.

For nearly three years, it was just the two of us during the day when daddy was working. A little double act, we spent our time playing, crafting, baking and cuddling. We visited the park and soft play more times than I care to remember, spent hours at Pets at Home and Go Outdoors (you used to love pretending we were camping!) when the weather was inclement and we had a ball with your little buddies on numerous play dates. We read, we laughed, we sang and danced and you taught me how to be a better person and a good mother.

When Phoebs joined us 2 years ago, you amazed me with your acceptance of her and your protective big-brotherly love and I can’t thank you enough for making the transition from 1 to 2 so easy for daddy and I.

jack1

But tomorrow everything changes as you embark on a new adventure; your new adventure.

Your first day at big school.

In less than 12 hours, you’ll be joining your new classmates in your slightly oversized uniform that I’ve dutifully labelled and you’ll be starting a new chapter without me. I’m beyond excited for you as you set off on this huge independent adventure, but I’m also feeling incredibly sad, because I’ll really miss you and I know Phoebs will too.

I’m sad because tomorrow marks the end of an era; the carefree, spontaneous, unstructured chapter of our lives has come to an end.

I’m sad that you won’t need me as much as you do now.

I’m sad that I won’t know what you get up to every day; I’ll only know what you choose to tell me (which if it’s anything like your nursery days it will be “nothing”). 

I’m sad that I won’t be there to hold your hand and offer reassurance when you’re feeling unsure of your new surroundings and I’m sad that I won’t be there to kiss your cuts and grazes when you fall or help you if you fall out with your friends.

But I have to learn to let you go and I know that you’ll have a ball with your new little buddies learning, playing and growing so much in every way.

I’ll try and hold back my tears as you head off into your classroom tomorrow morning (but no doubt the tears will flow as soon as I turn on my heel back to the car, if not before!) and I’ll be there with the biggest smile on my face when I come to pick you up in the afternoon.

Jack William, you are handsome, kind, charming and loving and I couldn’t be more proud of you. Thank you for being you. I have cherished every moment of our time together and I will miss you so very very much.

Dream big little man, tomorrow you will move mountains.

xxx

Starting school

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  • IngaSeptember 5, 2016 - 8:32 pm

    Awww Steph, so beautifully written, it made me tear up thinking of Isabella when she started last year and now she’s in Year 1. I’ll no doubt be joining you in tears as she sets off to her new classroom tomorrow!! Such a momentous moment for parents I think! Joshua will also be starting nursery too in next few weeks so times are changing for sure!! I hope you get through the morning ok! Hugs xReplyCancel

    • Steph@HelloBabySeptember 5, 2016 - 8:34 pm

      Thanks so much lovely. It’s the anticipation that’s the killer isn’t it. He is more than ready, it’s me that’s not!!! I hope Isabella has a lovely first day back xxReplyCancel

      • IngaSeptember 5, 2016 - 8:45 pm

        I know, parents are the worse!! Thankfully at least Isabella looked back at me when she went in on the first day rather than just running off without a glance back haha!! Hope he has a great first day too!! xReplyCancel

  • Kara GuppySeptember 6, 2016 - 11:20 am

    Such a lovely post. Good luck on your school journey little man xxReplyCancel

    • Steph@HelloBabySeptember 7, 2016 - 10:33 am

      Thanks Kara xReplyCancel

  • Vikki HolnessSeptember 6, 2016 - 12:36 pm

    Awww this is so beautifully written lovely, a wonderful tribute to your little boy. It’s such a bittersweet time for us mamas isn’t it? I had Riley start school and Harry start preschool today so for the first time in almost 5 years i have zero children at home. It feels strange and while i’m super excited for this new chapter in their lives i feel like a part of me is missing without them around! Hope Jack has a wonderful first day xxReplyCancel

    • Steph@HelloBabySeptember 7, 2016 - 10:33 am

      Thanks Vikki, I hope your boys had a fab time too xReplyCancel

  • Dannii @ Hungry Healthy HappySeptember 7, 2016 - 10:29 am

    What a sweet post! I can’t believe that summer is over and it is back to school time though!ReplyCancel

    • Steph@HelloBabySeptember 7, 2016 - 10:34 am

      Thanks Dannii, It’s bonkers how quickly time flies isn’t it! xReplyCancel

  • Harriet @ Life With Mrs LeeSeptember 8, 2016 - 1:06 pm

    Oh this is so beautifully written, made me feel a little emotional. I so hope hes had a great first few days xxxReplyCancel

  • This Mama LifeSeptember 9, 2016 - 7:53 pm

    What a gorgeous post! These open letters for starting school are just so lovely and will be such treasured memories for the future. I really hope all went well :) xReplyCancel

  • GeorginaSeptember 9, 2016 - 8:23 pm

    Awww this is so beautiful! It’s so bittersweet isn’t it, I was a bag of emotions for our little girls first day at school but it’a so lovely to see them grow XXReplyCancel

  • JodieSeptember 10, 2016 - 5:58 am

    I hope everyThing went well with school. It’s such a big step.ReplyCancel

  • StephSeptember 15, 2016 - 10:48 pm

    This is beautifully written. I can’t believe that summer is over this quick!ReplyCancel

  • […] A year that saw Jack starting a new chapter without us when he started ‘big school’ in September. […]ReplyCancel

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